The Sex Thing
by sunshineditty
Summary: Penny and Sheldon are dating, but when Penny discovers something about Sheldon, will this break them as a couple?


They almost broke up the first time she touched his dick after a heavy make out session and discovered he was limp and uninterested. It took two weeks, countless emails and IMs, failed video chats before Penny came to realize it was Sheldon really, _and not her._

While she excited him mentally and emotionally, physically he was unaffected while being touched by someone else, as he could only achieve erection and orgasm as long as he was the one in control; it didn't really come as any surprise to Penny because Sheldon was pictured under the term "control freak" in the dictionary. It also shed some light on the failure of his and Amy's long term relationship.

Penny told him she needed some time to think this development out, and she nearly rescinded her words when she saw the pained look in his deep blue eyes. Sheldon was one of the brightest minds of the twenty-first century, but he was long inured to being considered a failure in every arena other than Physics. She knew by his quiet goodbye he didn't expect her to continue in a relationship with a man who didn't like to touch his girlfriend sexually as he was well aware of her sensual demands in the bedroom, courtesy of Leonard's big mouth and thin bedroom walls.

She thought long and hard, even going so far as to pull out the whiteboard Sheldon kept at her apartment to write down a list of pros and cons:

CONS

Controlling

Weird Sex thing

OCD

Clean Freak

Arrogant

Always right (or so he thinks)

Unapologetic

Narcissistic

Too smart for his own good (and mine)

Needy (refuses to get a driver's license)

PROS

Sweet (in his own geeky way)

Southern manners

Faithful

Loving (in his own geeky way)

Has a job

Comes from a good family

Loyal

A good friend

Soft Kitty

Generous

In essence, he had as many good qualities as bad, but was it enough to get over the sex thing? Was sex more important than an emotional connection? In the past, sex was the focus of her previous relationships, almost to the exclusion of everything else no matter how she tried to fool herself. One of the reasons she finally broke the cycle of off-and-on-again with Leonard was the realization they didn't have much in common or really like each other. And the sex wasn't that good since he was still insecure despite six years and other women during their off phases; she might be a big ol' five, but even she liked a man to be confident enough to take control in the bedroom occasionally without expecting her to do all the work.

Was she willing to let a great guy like Sheldon, despite his neuroses, slip through her fingers over a physical thing? Could she? Was she willing to settle for anything less than a full and realized relationship just because she was scared of change? When in doubt she went to her best friend, but what happens when the best friend was the guy she was obsessing over?

Penny wasn't a thinker by nature, more of a throw yourself on the back of a bucking bronco and hold on for eight seconds type, so she decided after three days of angsting, she was done. She burst into his apartment, mouth already open, and had to stumble to a stop when she saw he wasn't alone. Of course not, it was Anything Goes Thursday night, so all the guys were there with their ladies - Penny couldn't be gladder to see Leonard with a new girlfriend as it meant he finally had realized she wasn't coming back to him - and Sheldon settled into his spot.

"We've decided on Italian tonight, Penny. I'm glad to see your nose hasn't failed you yet."

Sheldon supercilious tone usually raised Penny's hackles, but she was just glad he was speaking to her still despite the cooling off period she demanded.

"I wanted to talk to you." She eyed everyone. "Alone."

"Uh Penny can I talk to you first?"

Leonard was wringing his hands like an old maid, face scrunched into the constipated expression which meant either he was really determined or he was on the verge of an asthma attack. Since Sheldon didn't look inclined to disentangle himself from the others - Penny glared at him for that - she followed Leonard to the hallway.

"What's up?"

"Uh, well, Sheldon's been acting weird even for him, and I wanted to make sure, uh, things were okay between you two."

Penny shrugged, still uncomfortable talking to Leonard about Sheldon, even though they'd been broken up for nearly a year now. "We're just going through some things."

"Yeah, I figured since he hasn't been sleeping well the last couple of nights. Can I help?"

There was a moment when Penny wanted to confess her fears and worries, especially as Leonard could relate to some of her issues, but reality stopped her. Leonard and Sheldon's friendship took a huge hit years ago when he tampered with the results of their tripe to the Arctic, and things had slowly healed until Penny broke things off permanently with Leonard.

Sure, it was eight months before she and Sheldon started tentatively dating, but Leonard still considered it a breach of the Bros Code for even contemplating it, despite the fact Leonard was guilty of far, far worse. It was a weird jealousy thing on his part she didn't quite understand since Leonard was, considering his ambitions, the most normal of his pack of friends with more female company than the others combined - if you didn't count the women Sheldon attracted without even trying. Which, Penny privately conceded, was probably part of their problem: Leonard wanted companionship, but was too insecure about _everything_ while Sheldon was himself always and was considered attractive because of it.

"No, thanks though," she muttered, trying for sincerity.

Leonard nodded, sensing her irritation with him, and melted back into the living room while Penny drew a breath before facing everyone.

Sheldon looked up from his food and cocked his head in the certain way he had when trying to figure out something that wasn't Physics or science related.

"You came over here unaware of the time or day, so something is on your mind. Since we've been separated for three days and there is only one thing of import on your mind, you're here to talk about our relationship."

"Yes."

Penny fully expected Sheldon to ignore her because it would disrupt his precious routine, but he placed his food on the coffee table and stood. Everyone gaped at him when he said, "After you."

Proceeding him into her apartment was a bit surreal and she kicked herself when she spotted the whiteboard leaning against her counter, a beacon underneath the bright light of the kitchen.

"I see you wrote out reasons for and against continuing our relationship."

"Uh, yeah. I needed to see it in black and white, I guess."

"Logical. I'm impressed, Penny, as it seems you are taking this very seriously."

And sadly, he _did_ seem impressed, as if the essence of them could be distilled down into a few characters on a board.

Penny motioned him to sit, and had to smile at the moue of discomfort when he pushed aside some of her clothes she'd dropped haphazardly onto the couch. She was usually circumspect about keeping the living room clean for him as she knew he was extremely discomfited by the mess, but it was the last thing on her mind. _Plus_, a small part of her rebelliously whispered, _if he wanted to be with her, he had to accept all of her foibles as she tried to do for him._

"Sex is a big thing for me and something I've always thought necessary for a healthy relationship." Penny began pacing in the small space between the couch and her front door. "But I realized that sex was also the problem in a lot of ways for me. I've been sexual since I was fifteen and a lot of those guys weren't my boyfriends so it kinda defeats my argument. Kurt was my longest relationship next to Leonard, and neither of those turned out well, and sex was, again, the heart of the problem there too. Kurt because he got it from other people while with me, and Leonard because that's all he wanted from me, as I was inferior to him in every way."

Here she stopped talking, moving, as the implication of her words hit her full force. For all his pretty words, Leonard had never given her dreams or ambitions the support or consideration she fully expected from her partner. He'd always jokingly belittled her, and she'd taken it because he was a nice guy and so much smarter than her, so obviously his words meant more. It wasn't until she quit her job at the Cheesecake Factory and started pursuing acting full time, that the pretty lie they were living cracked up and showed the mean underbelly.

Sheldon wasn't any different, not really, only he was upfront and honest about his thoughts. He had no filter, so he'd said some pretty mean things over the years, yet he also supported her decisions even if he didn't agree, and he was more than willing to be financially responsible for her until she got back on her feet.

Slowly she turned to him. "What do you think of my acting?"

Sheldon looked adorably confused by the seeming change in subject, yet obediently responded. "I have no standards to hold you to as I've ignored the arts for most of my life. GIven the small roles you've had recently, and the commercials in the past, it would seem you aren't as good as you want to be, but if its something you are that committed to, then you should do it. I have worked for a Nobel prize my entire life and would allow no one to stand in my pursuit of it; I have to admire the same dedication I've seen in you recently to succeed, even if you have less of a chance to achieve your dream."

Penny started laughing at the very Sheldon response, a mixture of both compliment and insult, but as always, his true thoughts. He wasn't holding back or hemming and hawing while trying to figure out the best thing to say to stay on her good side (so she woudn't withhold sex). An unbiased and true reaction was something she didn't realize she really appreciated until just now.

"Oh, Moonpie, never change. Promise me?"

"As we've discussed, only Meemaw can call me that. And I cannot promise you not to change when change is inevitable with age and time."

Penny leaned down and said, breathily, "I'm going to kiss you now and put my hands on your face while I do so. I will probably also sit on your lap too."

"So I may draw the conclusion we are still a couple?"

"Yes, you may, Moonpie. And I have a few ideas about how to get around the sex thing."

"The sex thing?" He drew back, affronted, like a cat hissing his displeasure. "The whole pretext of our separation was due to my inability to satisfy you in copulation the way you are accustomed to. How do you propose to get around it? I will not bend in this, Penny, no matter my feelings for you. Amy already tried and it was a complete failure, leading to the end of our relationship."

"What do you mean exactly by her trying?"

Sheldon turned away, his pale face blotchy with a blush. "One night she came into my bedroom and tried to entice me into undressing as she was already nude. When I refused and asked her to leave, she said I didn't need to wait until the robot revolution as I was already one if I could look at her and not want to ravish her."

Penny's hands tightened into fists at the revelation of Amy's near molestation of Sheldon. She'd become reluctant friends with the neurobiologist out of proximity and Amy's insistence, as ultimately they had little in common and Amy made her extremely uncomfortable at times with her forceful lesbian come ons. Their friendship had crashed when she and Sheldon broke up, and Penny instinctively took Sheldon's side, even if she didn't know the whole story.

"Honey, that was awful of her, and nothing like I planned." She paused, trying to get her thoughts in order. "You've said that you are attracted to me, and you do masturbate when you're alone, correct?"

Sheldon, who'd calmed down, turned even brighter red. "Penny, it's not polite to talk about that! It's shameful and dirty, something a good boy doesn't do."

"Between you and I, there's nothing dirty or shameful or anything. You're a scientist, so you know that erections and masturbation are biological quirks of nature, nothing more."

"Biology is the weakest of the sciences."

How much of that was Amy versus his actual feelings?

"That's beside the point, and you know it, Sheldon. I'm not saying we jump on the sex bandwagon anytime soon. We can take things slow, work on making you more comfortable -"

"I thought you understood my stance on coitus, Penny."

"Now hold on a minute. You didn't let me finish."

At least Sheldon had the good grace to look a little abashed. Apparently Mary was right, and he just needed a good strong woman to take him in hand.

"Sorry, ma'am."

"As I was saying, make you more comfortable with me physically, as in touching, or handholding. You've come this far with the kissing despite your germ phobias, so maybe we can go a little further. And -" she raised a finger in admonishment when he opened his mouth. "there is more to sex than just penetration."

At this, Sheldon looked a little intrigued, and Penny resolved to start researching things because she knew he looked to her as being the teacher in this, as she instructed him in the social arena.

"This, Dr. Cooper, could be the start of a beautiful relationship."

"But we've already started."

"Oh shut it, whackadoodle. I was paraphrasing a well-known movie quote."

"It must not be that well-known if I've never heard of it. And being a physicist I have a working knowledge of the entire universe and everything it contains."

Penny giggled at the familiar boast. "Who's Radiohead?"

"A working knowledge of the entire universe and everything_ important_ it contains."

Sheldon looked up at her with a small smirk, and Penny hoped with all the faith of a woman who'd seen her share of triumphs and heartaches, that they could make it work.


End file.
